Due to life circumstances, many borrowed or borrowed money. There is a category of people who "live in debt". It is quite natural for them to constantly borrow money from friends and acquaintances. When faced with such a person, people get lost and do not know how to properly refuse a loan, especially if their relative asks for money.
There are several ways how to properly refuse a person to lend.
Learn to say no and put your own interests ahead of others. However, do not require others to compromise their needs over your own.
The main thing is to show politeness and decisiveness in the conversation. If you are in doubt or do not know how to find a reason for refusal, ask to give you time to think. No need to mumble and hesitate, speak firmly and confidently. Avoid being categorical, explain the reason for the refusal calmly and politely.
If you have financial problems, just tell your relative directly. There is no need to lie or be apologetic, honestly explain that you cannot lend money, because at the moment the family budget does not allow it.
If everything is in order with finances, and you just do not want to lend money to an obsessive relative, you will have to come up with an effective reason for refusal.
For example, you can say that you have a major purchase ahead of you, and there is no free money right now.
The second option is to say that you put all the extra money in the bank in a deposit account and cannot withdraw it for some time, otherwise you will lose profit.
Another reason for refusal is to say that you save all your free money for summer vacations and vouchers to a camp for children.
Not entirely beautiful, but very effective way not to lend money is to refer to the prohibition of the husband (wife).
It's a good idea to say that you've already borrowed money from other people this month, so you can't help.
We can honestly warn you that you have decided not to borrow money from anyone from now on. This is a simple and straightforward answer, but there is a possibility that the person may be offended by you, especially if you have supported him financially in the past.
Offer the borrower to contact professional credit organizations (bank, mutual aid funds, microcredit).
For relatives who borrow money and forget to give it, arrange a check. Ask the "unfortunate borrower" to lend you a certain amount of debt and watch his reaction. Most likely, you will receive a refusal, and the relative will find another object for lending.
Do not hesitate to remind the debtor of the repayment deadline. Particularly forgetful relatives can be hinted at interest. Take a receipt from the debtor, especially if you borrow a large amount. If necessary, notarize the paper. Formalization of loans can scare off a persistent applicant.
You cannot joke with health and invent illness as an excuse for refusing a loan. This is ugly and fraught with consequences.
Work out a number of rules for yourself when dealing with "permanent debtors":
- never tell them about your real income;
- do not brag about new acquisitions;
- limit communication with those asking as much as possible;
- remember, and better write down the amounts that you borrowed;
- do not hesitate to remind about the debt repayment.
There are people who believe that relatives need to be helped in any case, even if they are not on time and do not always pay off their debts. A good way out of the situation is to determine a specific amount that you can borrow without prejudice to the family budget. The loan should under no circumstances exceed this fixed figure. Honestly tell the person who is asking for money that this is your credit limit beyond which you do not borrow to anyone.
Help others when you feel like it, and helping friends or relatives brings you moral satisfaction. If you have opposite feelings, then you should not help people. By experiencing negative emotions and helping "through force", you harm yourself, and sometimes even the one who asks you for help.
